April 10, 2003 - 9:17 pm
And I call them Miracle Pants. Armani Exchange Henna Stripe Jeans. 29 inch waist. Butt from here to next Thursday. Never before has a pair of pants made me feel so magical. When I slipped those babies on I knew that I wouldn’t be leaving the store without them. Did you hear me? Butt from here to next Thursday! I, Taylor, have a butt! A butt! Also, I purchased-- Um. I interrupt this shopping/Taylor-with-a-butt report to tell you that Mother has just called to tell me that a Lesbian couple tried to “pick her up” at work! And it’s getting better! She just said, “Do I look dykie?” Dykie! Mother said dykie! I love this!
Okay, that was wonderful.
I’m going to New York in 12 days. That kind of turns me on.
I have $8.12 to my name. That kind of turns me off.
It’s funny what 45 minutes in Armani Exchange can do to your bank account. Or not funny at all when you can’t pay your bills because you’ve made three new additions to your wardrobe. I hate calling home asking for money. Really, I do. But everything has been worked out and I’ll be okay by tomorrow, I’m sure. I’m just going to have to be very careful in New York. A few summers ago, when I went with Connie, I spent over a thousand dollars on clothes. I can’t have a repeat of that. I just can’t. I’m going to be good. I’m going to be thrifty. I’m going to buy only that which is on sale. I’m not going to waste loads of money on food that’s only going to be coming back out the next day anyway (what a waste!).
All of that is going to be rather difficult to hold myself to when The Canadian is around. The Canadian spends money faster and easier than anyone I’ve ever met in my entire life. Clothes! Food! Alcohol! It’s never too expensive for The Canadian! Although, I must say that I felt particularly fucking awesome when I spent more than him yesterday. I also felt particularly fucking awesome when he asked me to step out of my fitting room so I could “okay” his outfit. Quite possibly the hottest outfit I’ve ever seen in my entire life. If I had his body I would have purchased it in a second. But I don’t. So I didn’t. And now I’ll have to settle for standing next to him while he wears his outfit. Which is nice too. Because everyone thinks we’re dating anyway. Which, naturally, we aren’t. But you didn’t hear that from me.
How cute is that? He won’t buy anything unless he gets my seal of approval. Honestly. Once, he was at the mall with JoAnn Boobies and he tried on a pair of jeans and he really like them and she really liked them but he wouldn’t lay down the cash until he brought me up there, tried them on for me, and got my approval. I love the power I hold.
This has been a rather discursive entry if I’ve ever seen one.
Ta da
